Déjà-vu in Relationships


Have you ever felt like you've lived through the present - in the past? Like your life must be repetition because you feel certain that you've been through it before? This is a strange feeling that most experience at some point in their lives. The eerie sensation is one that we usually ignore, or try to push away; but I believe it is here for a reason.


I strongly feel the sensation of déjà-ju is our brain's way of telling us that there is a pattern. As humans, we are usually comfortable with habit, and change doesn't usually come easy. It makes sense that there would be patterns in our lives.


The patterns I'm referring to here are not superficial repetitive actions like wearing the same clothing every day. We usually follow comfortable patterns of interaction in our relationships, whether superficial or intimate.


Patterns can be good. They provide intimacy, security, and sense of "knowing" and confidence in what is to come. While some might argue that the "sameness" is a problem in relationships, in Couples Therapy we often focus on unhealthy patterns of interaction.


Whether unhealthy ways of relating to others, struggles communicating our feelings needs and wants, or skewed ways of receiving and interpreting information, or other issues, these patterns of interaction can influence intimate relationships and superficial ones.


If you are ready to learn about how to break unhealthy patterns in your relationship to bring healing and hope, reach out to schedule a free consultation.





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